Double Coverage

By Dan Hosler and Gino Ceruli

Episode 24

An unconventional look at the world of dynasty football through the eyes and minds of two fantasy football junkies.

·    Rex Ryan has backed off his full support of Mark Sanchez saying it is now an “open competition”.  Sanchez’s main competition comes from David Garrard.  He is a disc golfer.  Enough said – Dan
o    Tim Tebow, ever the good sport and gentleman, gave David Garrard a disc to welcome him to the team.Gino
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·    Bruce Arians said he’d be comfortable with Drew Stanton as his starting quarterback in 2013.  I’d love to insert a joke here, but there’s nothing funnier than that. – Gino
o    This picture of Arians was taken right before this quote:Dan

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·    The Raiders cut Darius Heyward-Bey because of their loaded group of wide receivers. - Dan
o    If I were him, I’d happily use my 4.3 speed to get the hell away from that organization. - Gino

 

·    The Cleveland Browns signed Desmond Bryant for two reasons. First, they have a startling lack of depth on the defensive line.  Second, this face may distract the fans from the terrible games on the field. – Dan

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o    This is his mugshot.  They claimed he was intoxicated.  I’m not buying it. - Gino

·    Double Coverage sucks when Norv Turner isn’t a head coach. - Dan
o    There’s always Todd Haley….oh wait. - Gino

 

·    I don’t understand all of the Marcus Lattimore love.  The guy has had two career threatening knee injuries.  He may need another year to recover from the latest injury.  Someone with these issues does not belong in the first round of rookie drafts. - Dan
o    I wish the guy the best of luck in his comeback but as a general rule, when drafting guys for my fantasy team, I require that their legs never looked like this: - Gino

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·    The number of good white wide receivers on the Broncos is alarming. - Dan
o    They’re practically a hockey team.Gino

 

·    Donte Stallworth crashed his hot air balloon into electrical wires, but at least he didn’t crash it into a person like he did his car.  Should this guy be allowed to operate anything that moves? - Gino
o    If he is ever allowed to drive again it should be a vehicle like this (that only allows him to go 5 miles per hour): - Dan

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·    This NFL fan still believes in Tim Tebow.  She references him several times: - Dan

o    Tebow could have prevented the fire, but he has other things on his mind:- Gino

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·    I found this footage of Elvis Dumervil and his agent dealing with the faulty fax machine that cost him a contract with the Broncos. – Gino

·    The Broncos would have made sure the deal was done if Elvis were a white wide receiver. - Dan

 

·    I’ve never seen a football player at any level get tackled more easily than Terrance Williams from Baylor.  He routinely gets tackled three times while getting his mail.  In his defense, his driveway is kind of long. - Gino
o    The sad thing is he would be the WR1 in Oakland. – Dan

 

·    Barkevious Mingo.  Best name ever. – Gino
o    He is no Tim Biakabutuka, but is okay. - Dan

 

·    New Arizona Cardinals management asked Kevin Kolb the tough questions before deciding to release him. - Gino

·    When he was asked that question, Kolb froze and looked like a white Desmond Bryant…mugshot style. - Dan

 

·    Darrelle Revis sent his agent to Tampa Bay for some preliminary salary negotiations, just in case he’s traded there. - Gino

o     Revis has scheduled holdouts in his contract demands. - Dan

 

·    Tom Coughlin criticized JPP for being out of shape.  Thanks for making me feel better about my body, Tom.  Douchebag. – Gino
o    Speaking of fat people. - Dan

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·    Bad news Kansas City. Andy Reid ate Alex Smith. You still don’t have a quarterback. - Dan
o    Eric Berry was missing for two hours on Tuesday and there was concern he had shared Alex Smith’s fate.  He was later found hiding in McCluster’s dreads.  He’s a survivor. - Gino

 

·    Many scouts are saying that Tyler Bray has the most potential of any quarterback in the draft.  You could also argue that a pile of shit could eventually, one day, become a head of cabbage.  Personally, I don’t like piles of shit or cabbage. – Gino
o    Tyler Bray is the Jamarcus Russell of shit piles. - Dan

 

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